Don’t Use Pickup Lines, Talk To Her

If you’re  using pickup lines to approach a woman, you’re not going to get far. Traditional pickup lines often don’t work with women, and in many cases they are derogatory and insensitive. Most of them make one thing clear, you want to have sex with her. If you read any of the books, or techniques from pick-up artists, their methods aren’t pickup lines, but instead pickup conversations, or sets. Their engagement with a woman is focused on a series of questions and answers aimed at engaging in conversation. It’s an area where where dates are created on a daily basis.

I’m often surprised by what works to gain a woman’s attention, but then I often thing these are the same things to get anyone’s attention. It’s either a question, a comment, or a conversation starter. If you see her reading a book, you could ask her what she thinks of it, or the title of the book. If you hear her in a conversation about a topic you have some knowledge in, ask some questions about what she may be discussing. Even a “what do you think of this music?” in a club or bar works wonders. The point here is to act naturally with a question or conversation starter.

Having can also act as a source of confidence. I feel intimated approaching a woman with the intention of getting her phone number. Walking up to someone and saying, “Can I have your number?” scares the crap out of me. However, I feel more confident asking within the context of a conversation, “Really, you are in the social media business? So am I, we should swap contact info!” or at the end of an engaging conversation, “Let me get your e-mail so I can send you my top 10 playlist, and we can continue talk music.”

A great conversation has the added benefit of making you more memorable than some of her other suiters. A pickup line makes you seem as just some other guy who’s trying to hook up with her. In most cases, there are plenty.

Photo By MousyBoyWithGlasses