My good friend, and dating coach, Thomas Edwards was one of the reasons I was able to find recent dating success. As a guy, he was able to put everything I was being taught into prospective and helped me gain the confidence to succeed in dating situations. Thomas is a great dating coach, his techniques enabled me to remain as myself, I didn’t have to change who I was to approach a woman. While I highly recommend his services as The Professional Wingman, he recently introduced a three-day dating seminar aimed at helping men with women, called Wingman University.

While Wingman University sounds very much like a similar pick-up artist’s seminars, Thomas’ approach is quite different. Wingman University is an extension of his mission to provide one-on-one coaching and hands-on training. Wingman University is a three day event, catered to 10 guys at a time, that includes over 20 hours of presentations simulations and demonstrations covering topics such as: approaching women, using and understanding body language, staying true to your personality, the art of flirting, engaging in meaningful conversation, building sexual tension, and lifestyle development.

The three day course aims to remove the anxieties we men often have concerning dating. Currently Wingman University happens in Downtown Boston at the Hyatt Regency Boston, and the upcoming events dates are July 23^rd – 25^th, August 20^th – 22^nd, September 24^th – 26^th, October 15^th – 17^th, November 19^th – 21^st, and December 17^th – 19^th. For more information and prices, visit http://www.wingmanuniversity.com

A week ago, I had the opportunity to interview Larry Wilson, the founder of Opposites Connect, a new online dating website with a very different approach to dating; finding your opposites. To many, the idea may seem counter intuitive, why would you seek the opposite of what you want? If you like cats, why would you search for someone who likes dogs? If your a Yankees fan, why would you ever data a Red Sox fan? The answer, it brings upon interesting conversation.

Larry referenced a recent post (Determine What You Can Handle While Dating), to help explain the concept. “Dating is built on conflict resolution,” he suggested, and further explained several problems with current dating websites. When you go on a date, conversation becomes a repetition of what is already known, and doesn’t lead to real conversation. Essentially the first date (or first meet-up) is a repetition of viewing their online profile. As Larry put it, “all we have found out was what we already know!”

Opposites Connect works differently, in the sense it works with people differences. If you and someone you like enjoy music, the focus becomes the differences in the types of music you like. She may be a Hip-Hop person, you may be a Hard Rock. There are three methods to connect with other daters on the website: personality tests, your preferences, and quizzes. Each connection is based on the differences rather than the similarities.

Personality tests have become a standard in determining compatibility between two people. For Opposites Connect, the same method is applied, but for different results. Having consulted with three well known female psychotherapists and dating coaches, Opposites Connect has created relationship dichotomies that will work well with each other. Here it’s more about how your differences in personality mesh. The matching is reasonable, you will be fitted with qualities that can fit yours, not qualities that are completely incompatible.

On any dating website you find meet other people based on your preferences, such as sports, music, and movies. On Opposites Connect the same premise exists, but thru a different lens. Preferences are turned into rooms, for example if you’re a baseball fan and your favorite team are the Yankees, there would be a Yankee room for you to join. Attached to this room would be a rival room (in this example a Red Sox room). Unlike most dating websites, Opposites Connect creates a running debate, or threaded like conversation between the two rooms. Here, Yankees and Red Sox fans can debate on which team is best; conversations I’m sure will become very heated (Yanks rule by the way!)

Along with the rooms will be weekly light hearted polls, where your answers will be compared with other answers. Here you can see who has answered similarly, but the highlights would be those who have answered differently. As Larry explained to me, by highlighting those who have answered differently, it raises a curiosity factor. You may want to know why a person answered a question differently, and it may spark a conversation that leads to a series of dates.

Another way to connect with others are thru quizzes. Opposites Connect will feature two types of quizzes; one long form mortality quizzes, another a series of lightning round questions. These quizzes help determine your opposite factor. While quizzing isn’t new (see OkCupid, which is based on quizzes), the approach is a bit different. The long form mortality questions are purely subjective, there isn’t a right or wrong answer, but they will help determine how you differer from other people. On the other hand, the lighting round questions are simple, fun questions to answer questions that will provide some insight into your differences with others. Here there isn’t a base test or right or wrong answer, but merely an understanding of your preferences.

I can’t help but to like the idea of Opposites Connect, as it seems to mesh instinctually with one of the core tenants of my dating advice; find someone different. The reasons Rule Breaker and I get along so well isn’t because we’re a perfect match, it’s because while we like the same things, there are differences in what we enjoy. We are all attracted to our opposites, there’s something new, interesting and exciting about them. I like this direction of trying to meet someone new, not because we like the same things, but have differences about the same topics we like.

Opposites Connect, will be opening their doors on Friday, May 28th, 2010. While the website will be free, if you sign up before June 21st, 2010 you will be eligible for a free access to the future premium websites features.

In both cases, there are success, and frustrations. I don’t believe online dating is as successful as advertise. I think the problem is, they focus on the who: who are you looking for, who is compatible with you, who fits you. There is a new generation of dating websites and services that focus on an important question, how.

How, in this sense “How do you meet someone thru online dating?”, is a very interesting question to ask. Going on a date with a stranger is a frustrating and scary process, if you’re dating just their profile. However, if you’re dating someone on your connection with another individual, there’s potential for higher quality dates. New dating sites begin to address this question in interesting ways. The best recent example would be How About We?, who focuses on members creating date ideas instead of a profile. People meet others by choosing interesting dates to go on. A iPhone and iPod Touch App, Urban Signals, tries to answer the question by focusing on location and missed connections. Thread (a service who I’ve written blog posts for) refers to the old adage of meeting new people thru the friends of your friends by using new social media tools like Facebook Connect. Opposites Connect, an upcoming dating website, focuses on the differences that cause great discussions on dates, while Crazy Blind Dates (which is under construction), focuses on meeting random people.

Each of these websites approach to dating differs from the traditional model of online dating. Instead of relying on a profile, these websites focus on how you’re dating, not who. These services are very unique, and there are other’s that I’ve not mentioned that have sparked my interest (such as GameCrush.) I believe these services will be better than what is normally offered. Instead of matching our height, weight requirements, they focus on the real qualities to dating.

Photo by: Kevin Lawver

The OkCupid App, is free and available for the iPhone and iPod Touch. It’s a cool app that keeps you up to date on your OkCupid dating world and works much like the website. It allows you to keep up with your current matches and Quivers, find new matches, favorite and rate profiles, and send and receive messages. Essentially it is OkCupid on the go. There were still a few bugs left with the process.

One bug that disturbed me was my match preferences weren’t synched with those on the website on the first run. This may be due to the limits of match searching on the app. OkCupid’s app match search is limited, you cannot choose certain aspects such as sign, ethnicity, or height. This doesn’t allow me to narrow the searches to any of my specific tastes. Another bug is a crash, the app automatically closes when it finds a profile that no longer exists on the website. If you mispel a profile name, especially after searching for it, it will automatically close. Beta features, such as Icebreakers and Buzz, aren’t integrated into the app either, currently the only feature that works is Quiver. Quiver are three choices OkCupid provides for you, the problem is, after viewing them for the first time, you cannot return to your quivers. An additional annoyance of the app is it’s inability to perform in landscape mode. This isn’t a deal breaker, but would have been a great additional polish touch.

Overall, the OkCupid App is a very good app that can lend itself to further mobile based dating. It’s a good way to keep up with your current dating picks, especially while on the go. I highly recommend the app, and think you should try it out for yourself!

Like fashion, dating trends tend to emerge over time such as interracial dating, cougars, and dating effeminate men. Many websites offer tips and tricks to these trends, but rarely do we get to hear a guy and girls side to the same topic. Enter LoveNation, a weekly web show hosted by my two friends Laurie Davis and Thomas Edwards. Both are dating coaches (eFlirtExpert and The Professional Wingman) and have teamed up for this interesting and unique show about dating.

What makes this show unique is, it’s geared to both men and women on today’s popular dating topics. Along with discussing trends, they answer e-mails from their viewers. There’s also a section titled “He Said / She Said” which features timely advice (such as the Midnight Kiss on New Year’s, or Inexpensive Date Ideas) from each host.

The new show has plenty of potential. While it may seem like just another dating advice show in a sea of dating websites, podcasts and blogs, LoveNation has a certain chemistry not seen elsewhere. While the hosts are dating coaches, they also provide real advice for real people. It’s one of the reasons why I often recommend the two coaches. Their personality, individuality and personal stories shine thru making the show an interesting and unique take about the upcoming and common trends that occur within dating.

Additionally, the advice is very on point (such as accessorizing with socks!)