Dating

The Girl You Like Has A Boyfriend. Now What?

A couple, walking with a third wheel in tow.

You think you’ve met the perfect girl. She’s attractive, likes all of things you like, and you two really get along. Co-workers and friends think the two of you make a great couple, and should begin dating. There’s only one problem, she has a boyfriend. So, what do you do now? Most guys tend to retreat, distancing themselves from the woman as if she’s uranium. It’s a self-serving gesture. It’s like you’re saying “I want to get to know you, because I want to see you without your pants on.” The point of becoming friends with someone is because they are great people, not because they would look great, naked, in your bed.

There are other alternatives guy’s try to employ, but they often aren’t of the best ethical standing. So, if a girl you have an interest in, has a boyfriend, what should you do?

Remain Friends

The most important thing is, to stay friends with her. I often think people are friends because there’s some form of attraction. There’s a quality that both find admirable in each other, and has developed into a friendship. The same laws of attraction apply for someone you like, but often there’s another layer when it becomes a romance. If she already has a boyfriend, that layer of romance may never develop, but that doesn’t mean she’s a bad person, or if circumstances were different, you wouldn’t have been her mate.

Don’t Take It Personal

Someone being in a relationship, rarely has anything to do with you. When you first meet a girl you like, you don’t know the rest of her life’s context. You don’t know if she is dating someone, or has been in a long-term relationship. Until that point in her life, you were never a part of the equation. Her having a boyfriend has nothing to do with you. Her relationship isn’t a referendum of how she considers you, romantically. She just happens to have another person whom she wants. Many women aren’t going to leave their relationship for a new guy, and the women that do aren’t the best one’s to seek.

Realize, She’s Not Leaving Him For You

The one thing, every guy makes the mistake of thinking, is that, given the right circumstances, she will leave who’s she’s dating for you. The problem with that train of thought, is it doesn’t take into account any of the other aspects of her life. There’s other man, just like you, waiting for her to leave her current boyfriend. You’re not top of the list, or even close. Most importantly, she’s not leaving her current boyfriend, for you. It’s not going to happen.

It’s Not A Competition

You’re romantically star-crossed, but she already has her romance. You aren’t competing for her affection, because you’ve already lost. Her affection belongs to another person. Any attempts to compare yourself to him, or to compete against him will fail. There’s nothing that you can do, to make yourself more attractive. As mentioned above, she’s not going to leave her current boyfriend, for you. Even if you saved a group of orphans from a burning building, she’ll still go home with her current boyfriend.

Consider Her As The Template

Use the girl as the template for the type of girl you would like to date. There’s many women who are single, available, and willing to date you. Plenty of them have the same combinations of qualities and traits that you find attractive in women. Rather continuing to torture yourself over the girl who is not available, find one who is completely available and like the one you want.

Photo Credit: Valerie Everett

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89 Responses

  1. Link

    sestamibi said on April 21st, 2011 - 8:18 pm

    Yeah, Rick Springfield already did this 30 years ago.

    Don’t be stupid and afflicted with oneitis. Move on and find someone else–and recruit the object of your affection to help you. She must have friends, right?

  2. Link

    ronald allen said on June 26th, 2011 - 10:17 pm

    i have the same problem. There is this girl that i like. We go to the same church she’s 15 i’m 14 and we are really good friends.Today i went to the parking lot to get her number but she said she has a boyfriend.when ever we see each other she does a cute wave like the other day.

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    ronald allen said on June 26th, 2011 - 10:19 pm

    what does it mean when a girl says i love all my friends.And you are her friend

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    Phil said on July 9th, 2011 - 4:53 pm

    I am currently getting a girl to leave her boyfriend for me. We have both liked each other for years but circumstances didn’t permit us to date. Sorry but this is a load of crap.

  5. Link

    Sid said on August 13th, 2011 - 5:07 am

    Your making it out like all girls, boys and circumstances are the same. Not the case. Did you ever think that maybe she isn’t happy in her relationship or her relationship is just “ideal” and there is nothing worth the aggravation of breaking up? If 2 people can connect in such a way that she sees something in him she doesn’t see in her boyfriend or has lost it and ends up falling for someone else then there is every reason she could leave him for someone thats going to make her happy. I am in the same situation. The fact is there are no tips or what to do’s. Wait. If she does like you maybe she will see the light eventually. Maybe she genuinely likes/loves her boyfriend, in which case be her friend. Thats better than nothing, right? I have been on both sides. Broke up with my horrible ex for this girl who had a boyfriend because i see something better than what i had. All im saying is… Wait. what will happen will happen. Just be her friend and anything can happen. Just dont force the relationship.

    • Link

      Single City Guy said on August 13th, 2011 - 1:50 pm

      @Sid lets be honest here: some of the circumstances you’ve laid out are straight from fiction. Could they happen, sure, and as you’ve mentioned, they’ve probably have happened. But in the majority of cases, the chances of you trying to convince, or sweep a woman’s from there current’s boyfriends feet is minimal. Is it possible? Yes. The same way the probabilities of me winning the lotto can happen. Are there techniques to try and pry a woman from her boyfriend, yes! But in the grand scheme of things, in the grand picture, most likely someone who’s in a committed relationship and is happy, isn’t going to leave that relationship. Hence the focus of the post.

  6. Link

    George said on August 31st, 2011 - 4:09 pm

    Thanks alot, I’ve been taking it very personally.
    Only I see her every day from monday till friday and it’s tough as hell.
    And really i’ve never ever seen someone alike.
    It’s a one of a kind girl, really..
    I’m just gonna have to wait and hope without putting real much effort into it. She noticed I like her i’m sure of that.
    Putting too much effort in it only brings pain so i’m gonna leave it and if something happens that’s a nice catch.
    All i’m gonna do is be there for her and talk to her but not as directly a goal to get her to love me. only to like me.

  7. Link

    griffin said on September 4th, 2011 - 7:38 am

    what!? saving orphans was going to be my last chance!

  8. Link

    Jorge said on October 5th, 2011 - 9:46 am

    No offense Single City Guy but you are stupid. I understand the focus of this post is for the specific situation of the girl being in a happy relationship, but there are infinite possibilities and combinations for these types of problems. I agree with @Sid that waiting, being there, and not forcing is the best course of action in any case. It is along the lines of the theory of positive reinforcement and reiteration. The more times you show the girl your good qualities, the more she will recognize your potential, and if by chance there is a hiccup in her current relationship, you increase the chance that the hiccup will become fatal for the relationship. If she recognizes that there is potentially good suitors out there and willing to please her she may be more willing to leave the current relationship. It is the same thing as happens with men. If a man is in a good, happy relationship with an okay looking girl, but a much more attractive girl comes along and shows a lot of interest, then the man tends to get more hostile in fights that never used to be a big deal. Also, Single City Guy, you need to either learn better English or revise your work before you post, there are plenty of grammatical errors here. And if you want people to come back and actually read more than one of your pieces, don’t paint such a bleak picture of the world. In this article you have managed to make it look like any girl in a relationship is not worth pursuing and can be replaced by another, which is not the case. If you are going to post something like this (and again, I realize that this is not a formal article) do a little research and think about the overall message you are conveying. This kind of a piece makes me hesitant to read anything else you have written just because of the overall tone. It sounds like you wrote this when you were pissed at women for some reason.

  9. Link

    Rajat Kumar said on November 2nd, 2011 - 8:47 am

    Jus be cool in front of her and let her think that you are the guy to be fun around and see the change she takes in your life and always fight with her when ur single knowing that she has a boyfriend and then appologies in a very romantic way to her it wil make her feel good and will like your attitude and then she will surely leave the 1st guy for u!!! ry i have succeedded in it n happy still!!! :) ;)

  10. Link

    deb said on November 5th, 2011 - 3:22 am

    I have a same kind of problm. I like the girl, who is my class mate. And one of my very good friends. Bt i hve controlled myself. Decide to be by her side in any situation

  11. Link

    jacob said on November 5th, 2011 - 9:31 pm

    what if you can’t get over her and every time you are with all you want to do is be her boyfriend but all she talks about is her current boyfriend and it just hurts to remain friends but you keep remaining friends because you hope that she will one day be yours?

  12. Link

    Mix said on November 9th, 2011 - 1:00 pm

    while this is great advice. its not easy to follow. yes there are many women, women just like her out there. but when men actually start having feelings for that girl, they wont care about any other woman.

    i know a girl that i talk to on the bus, she is so fun to talk, attractive, sweet, etc.. i get so excited everyday that i know im going to see her. BUT she has a boyfriend. it does make me mad because i want to see if she would like to go to lunch or something but now im limited because….she has a boyfriend.

    truth is, and this is what makes this situation tough…. is that once i started developing feelings for her, i wanted her…and only her… i could see the hottest chick at school or at the mall and i wouldnt give a damn about her because all i could think about was talking to my friend on the bus. yes i know theres plenty of women, but that is so cliche and annoying to hear especially when you thought you were finally going to go out with the girl of your dreams. my thing is just continue being friends, id honestly rather keep seeing her and possibly even start being part of her social circle if she has one than to not see her at all anymore. i can just keep showing her that im a good friend and easy to talk to and she can come to me in times of need. that atleast makes me feel like im important in her life.

    and dont tell men it is not a competition, mens lives are BUILT around competition. men compete for possible mates (biology class FTW), even though she has a boyfriend (not husband), im just going to play my cards differently. im not going to hit on her or try to flirt with her, instead ill just try to show her what she missed out on, and that we just met at the wrong time, doesnt mean were not good for each other it just means that she happened to meet her boyfriend before she met me. she wont leave her boyfriend for me and i wouldnt want her to, but i can tell you one thing is for sure, my goal is to be at the very top of that list, and by top i mean close enough to be at her boyfriends level. remember, women have a choice, men dont, men just chase. i can try to compete with her boyfriend for her, at the end its going to be her choice if she wants me or him. thats the nature of life. men will never stop competing, it will always be in their heads, its a quality that was built in us over 1000′s of years, its not going to stop just because of one guy.

  13. Link

    Mix said on November 9th, 2011 - 1:01 pm

    while this is great advice. its not easy to follow. yes there are many women, women just like her out there. but when men actually start having feelings for that girl, they wont care about any other woman.

    i know a girl that i talk to on the bus, she is so fun to talk, attractive, sweet, etc.. i get so excited everyday that i know im going to see her. BUT she has a boyfriend. it does make me mad because i want to see if she would like to go to lunch or something but now im limited because….she has a boyfriend.

    truth is, and this is what makes this situation tough…. is that once i started developing feelings for her, i wanted her…and only her… i could see the hottest chick at school or at the mall and i wouldnt give a damn about her because all i could think about was talking to my friend on the bus. yes i know theres plenty of women, but that is so cliche and annoying to hear especially when you thought you were finally going to go out with the girl of your dreams. my thing is just continue being friends, id honestly rather keep seeing her and possibly even start being part of her social circle if she has one than to not see her at all anymore. i can just keep showing her that im a good friend and easy to talk to and she can come to me in times of need. that atleast makes me feel like im important in her life.

    and dont tell men it is not a competition, mens lives are BUILT around competition. men compete for possible mates (biology class FTW), even though she has a boyfriend (not husband), im just going to play my cards differently. im not going to hit on her or try to flirt with her, instead ill just try to show her what she missed out on, and that we just met at the wrong time, doesnt mean were not good for each other it just means that she happened to meet her boyfriend before she met me. she wont leave her boyfriend for me and i wouldnt want her to, but i can tell you one thing is for sure, my goal is to be at the very top of that list, and by top i mean close enough to be at her boyfriends level. remember, women have a choice, men dont, men just chase. i can try to compete with her boyfriend for her, at the end its going to be her choice if she wants me or him. thats the nature of life. men will never stop competing, it will always be in their heads, its a quality that was built in us over 1000′s of years, its not going to stop just because of one guy.

    • Link

      Guest said on January 3rd, 2013 - 6:32 am

      Interesting arguement i have to say, but your still clinging to the hope of a “maybe she’ll pick me instead” scenario. i have to do admit though, its probably the highest odds you’ll have of ever winning over a girl whos dating someone else. and if she likes the guy ALOT, high odds are extremely minimal, id say probably in the trillionths. but hey, if u luck out, jack pot prize for you good sir!

  14. Link

    Random said on November 11th, 2011 - 5:52 pm

    All you can do is be there and make sure she knows your wishes. If she knows you want to be with her and still wants to be friends, it could be that she wants to get to know you better. If not shel balk and probably never talk to you ever again. That being said, odds she will leave do not lean in your favor. Be genuine and if she does leave, be sure to prove to her she made the right decision.

  15. Link

    stonewalker lawson said on November 15th, 2011 - 10:14 pm

    that is really helpful im 13 and a girl i like has a boy friend she had a crush on me for a month or so.I had no clue and lost her to a jerk i think she still has feelings for me but how can i tell shes the love of my life?write back how i can tell thank you.

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    stonewalker lawson said on November 15th, 2011 - 10:16 pm

    p.s. how can i get her back anyone can answer please quote.

  17. Link

    Victor Gradinaru said on November 18th, 2011 - 4:29 pm

    NO, NO, and NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Never give up — or wuss up — when you like a girl that has a b-friend. Try to get her from him… Cuz then, where’s all the fun, and you end up as a wussy…….

  18. Link

    Brenton said on November 22nd, 2011 - 8:18 pm

    Screw that, that last part is not true

  19. Link

    the alpha male said on November 23rd, 2011 - 1:05 am

    Yeah that’s all true if your an unattractive, clingy, shadow of a real man. Don’t wait around for a hand out or be one of the “gals” be someone she can look up to and recognize as a true alpha male. Project confidence, sense of security, a pair of balls, and any chick without a ring can be yours. Battle field tested!

  20. Link

    Soulmate James said on December 10th, 2011 - 2:58 am

    This is the information that we need to have good relationships!

  21. Link

    Random2 said on December 11th, 2011 - 4:05 pm

    So, just like the rest of us, I like a girl that has a boyfriend. I’m 20 and so is she. We are studying identical degrees, so this means I see her from 9-5 monday – friday, which is great but isn’t. She’s been dating her boyfriend for 6 years. I’ve been going with the plan that I’d try let her know that I’m a good guy and that maybe if she broke up with him I’d be next in line.. But I’m starting to think that maybe if she knew how I felt she’d see me differently (for the better), which might increase my chances with her..

  22. Link

    Random2 said on December 11th, 2011 - 4:07 pm

    I’ve known her for 3 years and my feelings are still the same and haven’t changed, I’ve looked for many other girls, found many, hooked up with many, so that whole, “look for someone else” isn’t working too well for me. Any advice?

  23. Link

    bobby said on December 11th, 2011 - 5:27 pm

    Total bullshit

  24. Link

    Seth said on December 11th, 2011 - 5:43 pm

    Random2

    This advice is a pile of wank – Lets face it if you truly want this girl for the right reasons and not just another number to add to the list then you have to go for it, one mans destiny to be happy with the person they care for can not be told not to go for it because of ethical reasoning…

    If you think about it when you care for someone so much you would do anything right? But if you want this person really think about it…not if it will last or what the future may hold becasue it’s not written and you take everyday how it comes.

    So you can sit around playing it safe and waste time…or you can tell her how you feel…go for it…Lets face it you just know when somethings right.

    I say go for it act on your passion – goodluck

  25. Link

    tevin said on December 18th, 2011 - 10:10 pm

    hey yup i think wht this article is so true.im in love with a girl who s in a long distance relationship and for a while i actually thought i could get her to leave him for me but i guess shes in love with him as much as im in love with her( th boyfriend is a douche btw ) he s possessive and annoying but i guess she doesnt see it .Anyways im trying to be her friend but i jus cnt seem to get over my feelings for her. Is there anyway i could get over them

  26. Link

    ColDChill said on December 21st, 2011 - 6:27 pm

    Dating game rookie needs help!
    Beleive this or not but I’m almost 41 Years of age and I’ve been with 6 women in my lifetime. one of which I have a son with and she pass on in 2002. leaving me to raise my son on my own now almost 10 years later I met someone. here’s the kickers.

    1) She’s 27Yrs Old.
    2) She Has a boyfriend

    My issues are these she has a long distance relationship she see’s him 2 days a week. The other 5 days she’s at my place having coffee playing cards! Being a friend is one thing, but this is driving me crazy. About 3 weeks ago we had a few drinks at my place and I’m what they call a Robinhood when I drink wanna help everyone. And I told her how I felt and that I knew she was in a relationship and that I wouldn’t have a relation (Sexual Or Otherwise) with her until she told me it was over with her boyfriend. At first I thought she’d never come back but the next day There she was over for coffee. Since then she’s been a SERIOUS Flirt :( Is she testing my words to her? to see if I was telling her the truth? in 1 month I know know so much about her I don’t know what to say I know everything from her like’s of shrimps and camping to when her time of the month is. I need some advice on how to approaches this situation. I don’t want to loose her as a friend but it’s killing me to see another man have her and what looks like to me not appreaciate her. I don’t want her to Cheat on her current boyfriend because what will prevent her from doing it to me if we do get together.

    P.S She’s even pointed out to me how she finds that he doesn’t put out enough! as to why she would tell me that I’ll let you be the judge.

  27. Link

    ColDChill said on December 21st, 2011 - 6:30 pm

    OH! sorry also want to add she’s french speaking and I’m French & english My son is mostly english And my son forces himself to speak french to her and her English to him. They get along great. he’s 14 now and keeps asking me if she’s my girlfriend. It breaks my heart when evertime he asks I have to say no :(

  28. Link

    ColDChill said on December 21st, 2011 - 6:34 pm

    tevin believe it or not you can’t trust me I’ve tried I’ve tried the cold showers to the I’m not home. they don’t work.
    Cold Showers just freeze you up then as soon as you see her you all warm again :-) and the not home when you actually are makes you feel bad for lying to her. All I can say is if there’s a hell now I know what it’ll be playing if I ever go there over and over and over :) So I’m making sure I don’t go there!

  29. Link

    Loc said on December 23rd, 2011 - 8:04 pm

    you make me feel bad

  30. Link

    Helder said on December 24th, 2011 - 10:06 am

    Fuck you I will not give up.

  31. Link

    Joe said on December 28th, 2011 - 1:51 pm

    Its a good exposure but how will I find lady without a boyfriend?

  32. Link

    Joe said on December 28th, 2011 - 1:52 pm

    Its a good exposure but how will I find lady without a boyfriend?

  33. Link

    Joe said on December 28th, 2011 - 1:53 pm

    Its a good exposure but how will I find lady without a boyfriend?

  34. Link

    mikko said on January 6th, 2012 - 5:15 pm

    Hi guys, I have almost the same situation too, anyone can give me some advice? The girl that I like has a BF, she just came here in U.S in March 2010 from other country. They’ve been together for like 16months before she came in U.S, now they’re in a long distance relationship for like 10 months now. I like this girl, and I think she likes me too, her mom is my step dad’s cousin by the way. I know we are not related. I think I don’t have to explain the details of why she likes me, you can just feel it. So, should I let her know that I like her even though she has a long distance relationship just to let her know I like her, or just befriend with her? I know my chances might increase if I tell her that I like her. Thank you guys in advance for some tips and advice :) I’m 21 by the way

  35. Link

    anon said on January 7th, 2012 - 8:39 am

    I’ve had this problem for a few months now and its driving me nuts! I’m 16 and recently a very attractive girl has become a very close mate, however she flirts and shows many signs that she likes me in that way but her boyfriend and his friends of whom she always complains about and gets upset about always get in the way somehow, my best advice to anyone in this situation from the limited amount of experience I have is to try to forget about the bastard who is stopping you from making your move and remember that as long as you stay friends you can keep trying and most of all you know that no matter what you will be there when and if that guy leaves.

  36. Link

    John Valor said on January 11th, 2012 - 3:09 am

    I find this useful. Just started college and I found this amazingly beautiful girl I wanted to get to know. We had class together and I finally started to talk to her and hang out. I found out she had a boyfriend -____- so I gave up. I still like her though but 1) I’m respectful of her relationship and 2) I’d rather be a friend than the annoying guy trying to split her up. We have a lot in common and I make her laugh. But it isn’t worth it to waste time for something I know won’t happen

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    Drew said on January 17th, 2012 - 9:47 pm

    the girl i like had a boyfriend and had a downfall relationship so i’m not sure to ask her out. any advice?

  38. Link

    Drew said on January 17th, 2012 - 9:49 pm

    the girl i like had a boyfriend and had a downfall relationship so i’m not sure to ask her out. any advice?

  39. Link

    A TRUE MAN said on January 18th, 2012 - 3:37 pm

    fuck tht kick the dudes ass and if she doesnt like u after tht move on

  40. Link

    Man I Needed to Read This said on January 26th, 2012 - 4:16 pm

    This is the most depressing information yet best advice I’ve read concerning this. No one likes hearing it’s too late, but once you accept it and move on it’s considerably better. It really is sad though…

  41. Link

    Tan shady vii said on January 29th, 2012 - 2:15 pm

    You suck
    wateva u told is jus crap
    you dont have any sense you don’t have guts to get that gurl cuz ura …….
    Leave that s**t
    u knw wat ur article shud make us up it shudnt make us pessimistic
    my attitude is just like my attitude b-positive

  42. Link

    Jackson said on February 1st, 2012 - 10:46 am

    I’m young, and I really like a girl. But in class the teacher is like “Who would like to help christopher on his project later today” and I raise my hand and Christopher looks right at me and Picks the girl that he has been crushing on for a while. We both like the same girl, and we’ve talked about it. But it’s easy to tell that I like her more

  43. Link

    Antony said on February 3rd, 2012 - 5:06 pm

    impossible ;( what if she is simply the most beautiful thing you have ever seen?

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    Lorran said on February 6th, 2012 - 1:27 am

    currently like this girl i just met who is in a long term. and i am with you antony… i think she is amazing! each situation is different. 9 times out of 10 i say go for it. at least let her know or something. girls are crazy you never know. i have seen it work and been on both ends. plus life is short!

  45. Link

    Abraham Chinonso I. said on February 10th, 2012 - 5:48 am

    Abraham Chinonso: I like this! But does it mean the girl may not later fall in love with you.

  46. Link

    bobby said on February 10th, 2012 - 3:18 pm

    hii guys.this really sucks.I really like this girl nd am sure she knows that.She trusts me nd does whatever I advice.I have been knowin her for 5 months now.She is the most awesome girl atleast for me.But the sad part is she has a boyfrnd.She never told me that he is her boyfrnd.She introduced him to me as a very close frnd.But damn I can make it out this dude always comes to pick her up and always around the corner to take care of her needs(I dont understand if he does’nt have ny job).And this dude really loves her.I thought I have no chance.But then I remember her once arguin with me that breakups r very common.And couple of days back she said I was soo sweet nd that she would do anything for me and this she said in front of her boyfrnd.I just said u killed me with that line.She smiled.But then again I feel she loves him a lot too nd dont think she would cheat on him for me.Even I dont want her to cheat on him for me.I respect her that she still sticks to him even though she knows I like her nd as far as I know appreciates my feelings for her.This dude is really lucky.m sad but as always am always der for her in need nd she knows that:))

  47. Link

    bobby said on February 10th, 2012 - 3:22 pm

    y is she soo awesome?? :( (

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    mikko said on February 10th, 2012 - 7:49 pm

    Hey Bobby, just keep what you are doing, it’s better to be friends with her than to lose her. It you guys are meant to be, it doesn’t matter how long it will take. Just be patience. That’s what I learn for myself. I do like this girl but I know that she has a BF w/c is in the other country. But I also respect her decision so I think it’s better not to tell it yet that I like her. It’s better to be friends with her, then in the long run, if you guys will be BF/GF, it would be great. Friendship then BF/GF isn’t that cool? Plus keep yourself busy a little bit and try to improved much better for yourself and discover yourself :) I know some people, they’ve been friends for like 10years before they became official BF/GF then got married. Just my opinion :)

  49. Link

    Jin said on February 13th, 2012 - 11:35 pm

    On one hand I agree with the people that think that waiting and being the best friend you can is a good idea, but on the other hand that can be a very painful route. If you want to do that, you have to learn to control your feelings and stop liking her or I imagine that it’s going to wind up hurting like hell.

    Maybe I understand it differently. I’m a girl and my situation isn’t quite the same. I’ve just got a crush that spends all of his time around another particular girl and rarely even looks twice at me. Hurts, since he use to until that abruptly changed for a reason I can’t understand and don’t want to guilt trip him about.

    Even so, the waiting is painful. I mean, being in a state where you’ve got a singular crush on someone like this article suggests… it’s too difficult to just sit back and wait for their relationship to fail or not.

    ..Also, some of you are saying that if you’re a good friend and their relationship hits bad times, she’ll realize the oh-so-amazing friend is good and bolt. I wouldn’t depend on things like that if I were you. EVERY relationship has hiccups. The relationship depends on getting over things like that, and if you seriously think a girl is going to turn tail and run to her best friend when that happens… I worry about how you treat them. Would you even ALLOW them to have a male best friend if you had her?

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    YouMom said on February 15th, 2012 - 6:12 am

    What a load of shit!

  51. Link

    poo said on February 19th, 2012 - 6:47 am

    If she has a shit in her ass when u have sex with her and u feel it with ur dick what do u do

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    italianboy said on February 23rd, 2012 - 12:10 am

    i have the same problem, we are both 14 and we are great friends she is in alot of my classes and for a month or so she has had a boyfriend and im not friends with i dont like him , i always flirt with her and i think she flirts back but i can never tell i can be realy oblivious sometimes, resently i have started to befriend her bf so he doesn’t notice my flirtations with her, i still like her and idk what to do help me plz cause this didnt help at all!

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    Smitty said on February 23rd, 2012 - 10:06 pm

    I am a victim of this. I think that all of this is the truth. And we “victims” do not want to hear it. I hate the feeling of seeing her everyday because its always the most awkward since we don’t talk anymore. I don’t think that things will ever get any better. </3

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    STR33TWILD said on February 23rd, 2012 - 10:34 pm

    this is krap

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    E-man said on February 25th, 2012 - 3:10 am

    Fellas, heres the deal. An older women once gave me advice worth gold. She let me know that a girl is always looking for somethin better. All girls want to have a boyfriend and sometimes they settle for someone that barley does it for them. This girl I know has a BF, I can tell she likes somethin about me and I know she knows I like her (chemistry, attraction -you know when you FEEL IT). You dont have to be a super nice guy -BORING. Girls want to be with someone who makes them feel alive. Its ok to be a little “bad” which means dont give a fu k. Dont kiss her ass, play a bit of hard to get then reel her in once shes hooked. Let her know your dreams and ambitions. Show your talent without being a show off. LIVE IN THE MOMENT. Look deep into her eyes (the windows into the soul). Tell her how beautiful she is, complement her – be romantic (not cheesy). BE YOURSELF. Forget what people think, LIVE LIFE. let her know whats up HAVE NO FEAR. They worst thing that can happen is youll know the truth, and move to the the next beautiful girl.

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    E-man said on February 25th, 2012 - 3:16 am

    Oh yeah and once you have the girl of your dreams. Be ready for the next guy to try to steal het from you. So you always treat her well and make her feel loved or else she will search for someone else.

  57. Link

    Ronald said on February 27th, 2012 - 3:08 am

    I’m a 12 year old in a middle school,and the girl I’m in love with’s boyfriend has been beating her. What should I do!?

  58. Link

    dw said on March 2nd, 2012 - 9:53 pm

    i will take on board wat u said e-man, some really great advice in there. i would never normally write/post on anything like this but u see my problem is a bit of a dilemma. so the girl, i already asked her out, she said ‘i dont wanna cheat’ so obv she has a bf. i know she likes me but thats where the problem starts. we work together and she is relatively new. to cut down any essay i was about to write, im a 8 1/2-9 she in my eyes is a perfect 10 but realistically prob a 7 or somethin. she is the one, i know it, i can feel it, i just kno you know. my question is or the help that im asking for is, how do i go about this shit. iv been like to myself, tell her how you feel, play hard to get, be a friend, be a dick, a number of circumstances, currently im being an arrogant behemoth, overtly confident, but i do try to be nice to her, i say nice things to her, ask her all the right questions. but i get the feeling this is making things worse between us. i also work with some very jealous people who are making things a lot more difficult. i really am in a pickle and i probably havnt explained the situation fully but i really need some anonymous advice.

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    Aaran said on March 3rd, 2012 - 2:26 pm

    ths the same problem u have she us gaving a boy friend but she also know that i love her we still have a good conversation as we are classmate and our home is in the same area we go to school together and also come back together will she leave him us there a chance

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    Fufu said on March 7th, 2012 - 8:43 am

    Would someone help me in this?

    I fell for her therefore I helped her finding an apartment and she was so gratitude to me.ever since, she started showing me a lot of signs that drew my attention towards her: Trying to draw my attention crossing my eyesight, sitting in a place that is prominent to me, laughing with her friends tilting her head back slightly in a way to look at me without drawing my attention _but I noticed that without keeping her knows_. Even we are friends of facebook and when I placed a photo of me and my pet into my album, she placed similar photos with similar pets into her arms! She cropped all her photos among friends just showing herself as if she’s trying to say: No one of them is a special for me. We don’t talk to each others eye to eye, but on facebook.

    I sent her a love letter on valentine, and after 20 days I had a chat with her on facebook asking her about receiving my letter and her openion, she replied that it was so nice and nice words but she already as a boyfriend and they’re doing so well together and they’re moving in together in few months!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Can anyone help me analyzing this to me and just to reply me what’s going on? I will appreciate it.

  61. Link

    italianboy said on March 7th, 2012 - 11:41 pm

    BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THAT GUY MAN!!!! if its the girl you love… sometimes we do crazy things for the women we love…. uum inless your scrawny and weak then uum … maby find proof or um get a friend me personally i wouldnt get an adult maby her parents idk im a big guy so i would just beat that kid im 14.. so im different the girl i love has a bf i wrote somthing about it earlier

    • Link

      elfbreezy said on March 15th, 2013 - 7:38 am

      i love you

  62. Link

    Anon said on March 8th, 2012 - 2:58 pm

    This is helpful but flawed what if you don’t want someone like her you want her, that’s what I’m wanting to know

    • Link

      Dwayne Leonard said on March 16th, 2012 - 5:44 pm

      I was saying the same thing..what if i just want her and not someone like her?

      • Link

        Gerbil2690 said on January 3rd, 2013 - 6:27 am

        Suffer for the rest of your life i guess.

        • Link

          elfbreezy said on March 15th, 2013 - 7:35 am

          Fuck you

        • Link

          elfbreezy said on March 15th, 2013 - 7:35 am

          Fuck you

  63. Link

    Wtfluv said on March 20th, 2012 - 5:48 am

    What a bunch of whinny men on this. Geez the worlds full of beatifull single woman and u chase after them like half starved mutts in heat.

  64. Link

    Mike said on June 25th, 2012 - 12:20 am

    Yep. Pretty much been there and done that and even there a bit now. I know a decently hot young lady at my apt complex but she has a boyfriend that I know to some small degree and really don’t mind as a person. They are slowly breaking up, but she is moving away 2,500 miles to do so. Just got to stay friends and move on. This is life, folks, and not Fantasyland. Besides, it is dangerous to place anyone on a pedestal. Actually would prefer she stay with BF and not move, to be honest, in hopes of meeting friends of hers.

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    derp wat too doo said on August 25th, 2012 - 3:58 am

    Thier is a girl I like that moved in recently (5 days ago) she is in a long distance relationship with some other Guy. I can tell she likes me just from how she acts around me but she still likes her boyfriend to my knowledge. I was easily her first friend here so I would assume I am at the top of list if her relationship dies out. The only problem is I don’t know to tell her how I feel or keep playing it out

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    The Single Man said on November 8th, 2012 - 8:56 am

    I had this happen to me recently. I grew attached to a girl I met and we were talking a lot. Then she broke up with her boyfriend and I had my chance. Well naturally I screwed that up. She was also friends with this other guy who she has been friends with for a few years and it looks like they are on the verge of going out. They have class together so naturally he had the inside track to her.

    Moral of the story: If she breaks up, don’t wait 2-3 weeks to ask her out. Give her a few days and see if she will want to hang out.

    Needless to say, I am still single and it sucks cause I blew my chance with this one…. DAMMIT!

  67. Link

    winner said on November 27th, 2012 - 5:02 pm

    Ok! Forget the rules of what articles or some man spewing out the ways of seduction. Tell her who youare,what you want, and if you love her then tell her. Throw your cards on the table and step back and give her room. It’ll will happen if she is trult attracted. I’m in it now. I have found she is equally attracted and is now working on the break from the other guy. Be honest and don’t play games.

  68. Link

    Alex robertson said on December 6th, 2012 - 10:09 pm

    Buy here a cookie, bitches love cookies

  69. Link

    Red-vs-orange said on March 9th, 2013 - 9:52 pm

    I will never give up on her

  70. Link

    Red-vs-orange said on March 9th, 2013 - 9:52 pm

    I will never give up on her

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    That one guy said on March 22nd, 2013 - 12:38 am

    I have a girl that I like, and we’ve been friends now for about 4-5 months. I’ve told her how I feel, and she doesn’t reciprocate my feelings. She now has a boyfriend, and he seems like a pretty cool guy. Even though she isn’t with me, it makes me happy to see her happy. And I’m still more than glad to be her friend.

  72. Link

    That one guy said on March 22nd, 2013 - 12:38 am

    I have a girl that I like, and we’ve been friends now for about 4-5 months. I’ve told her how I feel, and she doesn’t reciprocate my feelings. She now has a boyfriend, and he seems like a pretty cool guy. Even though she isn’t with me, it makes me happy to see her happy. And I’m still more than glad to be her friend.

  73. Link

    Anonymous loser said on April 30th, 2013 - 1:59 am

    Hey guys, I’ve also encountered this same situation. I’ve met this girl not too long ago who I share a lot of interests, laughs and good memories with and she was single at the time, she had barely broken up with her boyfriend who was a complete dick btw but I didn’t wanna hit on her at that moment I wanted her to get over him before I made a move but I had waited too long and she has found another man but I just couldn’t take these feelings I had about her so I went ahead and told her how I felt despite her boyfriend, I didn’t expect anything to change, she has a boyfriend and I’m just a friend of hers but when I told her how I felt she told me she had butterflies in her tummy and throughout that conversation I noticed she cares more about me than I thought. She would be hurt if she lost me and so would I. But the one thing she said gave me hope<3 she said "look don't take this as a no but who knows maybe its just not our time?:)". This is the reason I'm still waiting, for one chance that we could be together but what eats me is that I could be with her to this day, I wouldn't be dealing with all this sadness if only I had told her how I felt about her sooner :( I understand for most people out there, the more u wait the harder its gonna be

  74. Link

    Anonymous loser said on April 30th, 2013 - 2:02 am

    But don’t give up if u truly beleive these feelings u have about her are real than keep waiting and one day things just might go your way:)

  75. Link

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    tracy said on May 28th, 2013 - 10:44 pm

    God help me thought this man i met online (Dr Olabisis) he help me with a spell that work like magic after some time.after every thing that happen to me and my husband because I could not get pregnant.Today i am so happy that i am pregnant and soon i will be having my child that is a girl.Thanks to God and also to Dr Olabisi who help me with the spell that improved my life Today.contact him via Email:Olabisispelltemple@gmail.com

  78. Link

    Gajendra said on June 7th, 2013 - 7:55 am

    I am living with my girlfriend and one another couple in a flat.i want the to date with other one.we are friendly and frank to each-other and she knows i like her.had drinks many times.i want to have fun with that girl so what to do and how comes it possible.plz revert and guide me asap.
    Thanks
    Gajendra Parashar

  79. Link

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  80. Link

    Jonny said on October 13th, 2013 - 9:04 am

    This is the dumbest write up I’ve ever come across in my entire life. Who wrote this,if you don’t mind,can we see your picture so as to match this trash with a face?

  81. Link

    B said on October 13th, 2013 - 12:56 pm

    There is no definite answer to this problem. There is no right and wrong. I think the best way to figure this out is listening to your heart and hers. If you think its worth the risk, take it. Though You have to take considered into how she feel. Ask your self that is your love for her would bring her more happiness then how she felt right now with her boyfriend. If you end up not being friend anymore due to the confession, do you think she really worth all the pain? I hate giving up on someone, especially the girl you love so much, but at the end of the day we have to put her feeling first before ours, that I think is true love. Though never give up because lover are all gambler nothing is definite. Good luck to you all !

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    Franklyn said on February 14th, 2014 - 1:42 am

    This is a topic which is near to my heart… Best wishes!
    Where are your contact details though?

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